As I shopped for deals I found plants I really loved. I even researched them and picked out a snake plant because they cleanse the air.

My husband loves ferns, so I bought a big beautiful fern to go by his office desk.

Then I watched the plants die.

That’s not totally true. I didn’t watch them die. I pretty much ignored them as all but the hardiest plants died. Luckily the snake plants were tough, but the fern gave up the ghost as it struggled between under and over waterings. The aloe vera plant I envisioned growing into beautiful natural medicine, shrank into oblivion, though we did get to use it several times.

The beautiful Norfolk Island Pine survived for a while before I missed watering too long and its needles became crusty and fell all over the house.

I had wanted the plants to serve me, but I was not willing to serve them. I wanted them to give to me, but I wasn’t willing to even check their soil and water on a regular basis.

The plants really did matter to me, but there were other louder more pressing things pulling away my attention.

And so, something that I did want, but not enough to really care about it, was set on the back burner and left to wilt and die.

It is how our world, at least my world, today commonly works. Give to those purposes and activities which call the loudest. Getting the girls to their volleyball practice called louder than the 10 minutes needed to check and water the plants.

Unfortunately, as we give in to the loudest rather than the most relevant or desired voices we are carried on the torrent of life, leaving behind so many of the things we wanted. It is not that we didn’t also want those other things, but we chose that which we placed the most importance on. For me, the plants fell in dead last place.

I would ask kids to water them who weren’t really interested in helping out with the plants. I would think about it and then forget about it before I entered another room.

So, here something I wanted was left to die.

Plants were a visible example, but I have to wonder how many other things in my life have simply been left to die? Or how many endeavors did I pursue that I didn’t really want in life.

The reality of life is, those things that we truly want, we have to nourish. We can just think something sounds good or looks pretty and magically they are integrated into part of our life, but that’s what I expected with the plants. That’s what many of us expect with many things. The plants weren’t my first failure, nor will they be my last.

Fortunately, I can try again with the plants. But as it has been made clear, the same approach will have the same results.

We have to show diligence and commitment to the things we want in life.

There’s no way around the effort it takes for good things. If we want a good relationship, we have to learn what a good relationship is. Then we have to practice elements of a good relationship.

I’m reading The Practicing Mind right now. This is a great resource to start with. It will help you understand the need to enjoy the process of the things you want.

If I want my plants to thrive, I need to enjoy the process of watering them and checking on them. For my writing to thrive, I need to enjoy the process of writing. If I want my children to thrive, you got it. I need to enjoy the process of growing with my children.

There is really no art at all to killing plants, except caring for something nothing more than in my mind. With that life strategy, I have a keen ability to kill every dream and aspiration.

But, if I want the things I dream of to thrive, then I must start enjoying what it takes to get me there instead of just flying down the highway of life at top speed with nothing more on my mind than the destination.

Click here to for a poem about embracing the stillness of life.