When you get a speeding ticket for going 60 in a 40 mph zone, it’s a pretty good indication you need to slow down.

The $300 ticket was the perfect gift two days before Christmas. I pinched and saved and carefully bought each present for my family and then I threw $300 in the toilet. To say I pretty much regretted waking up that day is accurate.

I was able to go to court, tell them I’m an idiot, and not also have 6 points on my license so I can throw more money at insurance. Well, there is a caveat. As long as I can keep myself out of trouble for the next 6 months and my lead foot off the peddle.

I have all kinds of justifications in my pocket. It was a complete trap on a road leading into a highway that changed speeds about three times in less than a mile. I’ll be honest though, I didn’t even know what the speed limit was, I just thought it was a Colorado highway and a typical speed is 55 to 65 mph for those. But truthfully, I didn’t know how fast I was going when he clocked me. I wasn’t paying attention to that, just my ever-present need to rush from one thing to the next.

There are so many arguments I can make to justify this act of stupidity, but none of them matter.

There was no reason to be in a hurry. We were just going to a little fun Christmas activity, which we arrived at and promptly left because my, merry little Christmas present pretty much killed my Christmas spirit.

But actually, I was in a rush. Only because I have put my life in that state. There was no reason to be in a hurry, but if you can save a minute or two speeding, why wouldn’t you? (cough, $300 ticket) And of course safety and all that important stuff.

This ticket was a symptom of a bigger problem.

I wouldn’t have even identified this as a problem a year ago, probably not even three months ago, but I live my life in a constant state of rush and chaos. It has naturally snuck in. Actually, maybe I’ve always been like this. I don’t know, but I know my kids aren’t, so there is a good chance I was not always some hyper-active, always-have-something-on-your-mind type.

Just this morning I waited 10 minutes for my son to put on his snowsuit. Very patiently, er, impatiently, I might add. He was doing his thing and getting it right. This was the same as when we tromped through the snow down to the horses. He was in awe at how deep the snow was and I was thinking about what I needed to do next.

Ever wonder why young children are so happy (sometimes very unhappy)? Because they live in the moment. They are a reaction to the present moment, not all the baggage and retreat on their mind, or what they need to do for the day or week or year.

I’ve only been trying to do what it seems like everyone else is doing or somewhere, somehow I got the idea that I should be doing. Keep my children happy, provide a good life for my family, stay engaged, and yes, entirely lose my mind.

Really, that’s where this is headed. When I have the opportunity to set aside my anxiety, I’ve been picking up my phone and feeding the monster. It’s as if an anxiety-free moment induced panic and triggered me to add more of it to my life. What would I do, lest I didn’t feel like a crazy person? Scrolling is the quickest, cleanest, most accessible source of a high-anxiety hit.

At the beginning of the year, I started to think about all the things in my life I wanted to get rid of. First was my electronic addiction. (Read all about it.) This, bless its heart, (You all know what that means right?), addition to my life had been plaguing me for years.

There were voices screaming in my head.

“What are you doing?”

“You are wasting your life away!”

You’re right I would agree and I meant it. Then I would tell myself, “Oh, just one minute won’t hurt.”

Wait! How did 5 months just pass and I’m still scrolling on my phone for just one minute.

I made some major progress in finally kicking my addiction–though it’s like you knock one thing down and another pops up–text messages are my big new distraction.

Still, I made mood-altering progress. Last night I had a small relapse, it might be nicer to say I indulged in scrolling on Facebook for a bit. I’ve still been on Facebook, but only when I had a specific intention.

There was no mistaking it. I felt a shift in my mood, and not a good one, as the time I was on Facebook grew.

The great thing about the space I had given myself from scrolling was it allowed me to identify this shift and turn it off. I wouldn’t have consciously noticed my mood swing a month ago.

Back to the rush.

All these determinations I have made are intertwined. Getting off electronics unless I have clear intentions has removed so much of the rush from my mind. It’s incredible.

Of course, there’s still a lot there. It was pretty bad.

Probably 90% of my busyness is mental. Thinking about what needs to be done next. Feeling overwhelmed at 50 things that are on my mental checklist that I want to be done RIGHT NOW! Fighting back and forth between all the things I ought to do and want to do and building resentment in the process.

Personal improvement goals are great for realizations. I previously thought I was pretty organized and had things together. I don’t even know where I got that idea, because I’m a total flying-by-the-seat-of-my-pants mess. Overbooking. Committing to things I can’t or don’t want to do. I say yes and then wait for myself to go insane.

As I worked on distractions, I knew I needed to get organized. (Hence the many printables from the month of January.) I’m still not organized, but baby steps.

Getting organized is the same thing that is going to help me to get out of the rush of life. BUT, in that organization, I need to schedule in some peace and quiet, not just things to do. I need to set aside time to not do.

I’ve heard it time and time again that you need to prioritize your time by doing the most important things first.  When you just “go with the flow” trust me, you will get carried away in it and wonder how you ended up 15 miles downstream from where you intended.

I’m incredibly scattered.

I’m here, there, and everywhere. There are so many things that I want to do and then I get an idea in my head and decide it should be my life’s work. Until tomorrow when a new idea pops into my head that seems like a better fit and something I must do right now.

You know what I need the most. Mental space. Space to choose my priorities and to make decisions instead of letting decisions make me.

After I got my ticket, I was being a good girl and following the speed limit.

We have this beautiful, spacious, wide-open highway that goes in and out of Beulah. It’s empty and clean and perfect for an over-the-speed limit drive.

Because we live so far from civilization, it seems like we should hurry and get there. (I don’t know how this makes any sense, but anyway.) After I got my ticket, I turned the music off. I set my cruise to the speed limit. It feels incredibly slow for that wide-open highway. And instead of rushing and thinking about the next thing, I just stayed present. There I was, on the road alone with myself for a minute, with nothing to do but drive and observe the world around me.

I watched the mountains and the farms I drove by (they aren’t really farms, mostly big parcels, but farm sounds more romantic). I just let myself be in the moment. That’s not something I often allow of myself. I especially didn’t when I was chugging the Facebook juice.

Being present changes you.

This is no joke. Being able to be quiet, to sit with yourself, changes your whole state of being. The anxiety and worry and what-ifs and I-need-tos, are eliminated if we can just sit still in the moment. Can you just be where you are instead of being in some far-off place in your head?

I’m tired of running through life like it is a sprint. I’m ready to be on a cruise boat, to enjoy each moment and bask in the beauty of all that’s new or old, clean or dirty and just be there instead of always having to think and do. What is the rush? To get to one more unnecessary activity or check one more thing off the never-ending to-do list?

Of course, you can’t sit around and meditate your whole life. Wait, can you?

No, there really are things that are important to be done, like keeping food in the house and such. But, I can stop creating a mental craze and I can start actually living in my life instead of burying my face in the anxiety exuding from the digital world just a click away.

There are five heavy hitters I’m bringing in to move away from the rush.

1. Electronic management

I’ve talked and talked about it. If you don’t rule your electronic life, it will encompass you. It will steal from you–your time, energy, peace, and happiness. Get it under control. You may not be able to banish technology from your life and go back to the 1800s (a truthful wish sometimes), but you can choose how you use electronics in your life.

2. Meditate

I’ve been a hippy at heart for a long time. Now I’m ready to just embrace it.

I’ve intermittently tried meditation. Being quiet, present and kind to yourself. It works.

Here’s one I love. Maybe it’s mostly because I want to sit on the beach just being. You don’t need a beach though. Don’t get me wrong. Beaches are never a bad thing, well, except maybe in a typhoon. But seriously, you don’t need some special, magical circumstances surrounding you.

I don’t even meditate properly. Sometimes I lay down wherever I am and just close my eyes. It doesn’t matter. I need that mental space and this provides me with some. And if it turns in to a nap, well then I must need more sleep.

If you haven’t tried it, just do. Give yourself 10 minutes and if your mind wanders and you realize it has, you are doing it right (at least that is what I keep hearing.)

3. Move to the present moment

If you follow my life at all, you know I’m doing a series on how mustang horses have helped people. (You can read them here). These stories are amazing. No exaggeration, 100% of the people I have talked to have said that mustangs have helped them because you have to stay in the present moment with them. They know when you leave on some mind-journey. They are wild horses, after all, so it’s important to be there and aware. You don’t have to have a mustang though.

You don’t have to have anything except a behind to sit on.

Sit down. Stay there. Leave your phone somewhere else (seriously, this one is important!)

Look up. Wherever you are.

In your bedroom, backyard, kitchen sink.

Just look up and around you. Take time to simply look at your surroundings. It is unique to that moment. Be an observer in your world, even for just 10 minutes, shoot, start with a minute or 30 seconds if you have. Nothing to do, nowhere to go. Focus on just being.

4. Set time limits

Cleaning is the bane of my existence, but I crave a clean house more than chocolate and flowers and gold at the end of the rainbow.

Before (like just last week) I would put on an audiobook and clean. Three hours later I would be done with one room and want to go bury my head in the snow because it felt like nothing had been done, except maybe finishing my book. I believe I mentioned I have a perfectionist issue that I also need to address. I could spend an entire day in each room of my house getting it just right. And that’s pretty much what I do. Nothing ever feels clean to me, except for one tiny corner.

I get stuck cleaning, longer than I want, with less progress than I want. Then I feel resentful about my life as a maid.

The other day I set an hour time limit and I was cruising. Everything didn’t have to be perfect. I hit the worst spots first and moved backward from there. I got so much done, it was amazing. It was because I knew I had this limited time to work on it–both that it wouldn’t last forever, and I didn’t have forever.

5. Set aside time for yourself

Have you been wanting to read a book? Give yourself time, set aside, to do this, watch a show, garden, paint, go on a walk. Schedule it in. We don’t hear it much, but you are literally the most important thing in your life. Paying attention to you is important.

Trust me.

It might feel fine to overlook it today, but you will reach a point where you realize how important it was and is. Hopefully that day will be before you hit burnout.

As busy, engaged parents or just someone working towards a goal or basically living life in the world today, it’s easy to justify personal time away in favor of what you believe you “should” be doing. Don’t fool yourself. You need time to pursue hobbies, work on something that has been on your mind, learn a new fun skill or just have a relaxing break.

Give yourself that time.

Literally, set aside the time, write it down, and stick with it.

Have I made this point clear?!

The world today is in a natural state of rush.

Everywhere you look the goal is more. Get more done. By more things. Do more. Achieve more. Build more.

If you go with the flow you will be swallowed by the pursuit of more. We have a choice though. You can wholly reject the premise the modern world is built upon.

For me, even though it goes against the tide and it’s easy to get sucked back in going the other direction, I’m working towards a world of less. Less rush, less stress, less anxiety. Fewer feelings of inadequacy, fewer comparisons, fewer things.